A Poet's Lament

A Poet’s Lament by GiGi Guajardo

You are a real Dick-inson
you don’t even deserve to have a sealed letter saying
“Heart we will forget him
Heart we will regret him
Heart we will abett him”
by telling him he’s unworthy of Aunty Em’s last name
My bro Walt Whit says you’re full of shit
walking around like
you’re ALL transcendental or sometheen’
you see you messed with the wrong poet
because heartbreak is like fuel to a Plath oven fire
No way you’ll come out with Neruda desire
you are icier than a Robert Frost on an Edgar Allen kind of day
You are a Poe-ser who’s only read the Raven anyway
and you’re unaware of how I don’t care about the dirty air you steal from others
as you rant about how your favorite poet is Dr. Seuss
When I ask about love poems
it’s roses are red, violets are blue
never original and never new
poets roll in their graves at how they can’t save the individuality
there’s general consensus behind your eyes
your conforming makes for rebellious cries
But just as Maya Angelou, Still. I. Rise
Because this is BS next to the TS that explains why women weep
as Italian amore seeps into everyone’s mind except yours
Your romance has the sophistication of Captain Underpants
while I wish for someone to whisper
mi amore se nutre de tu amor, amada and know that Pablo said it better
than the pop proxy produced to please pre-teen ears
that Rihanna singing “my love is your love” is not a poetic plea
but you wouldn’t see the beauty of fall trees on Walden Pond;
You’re Thoreau-ly devoid of meter and rhyme
more ridiculous than Kerouac, Jack in your mind. You gave me Mexico City Blues
because you couldn’t understand my love of the Spanish Moon
Your love was fickle like a monsoon
you didn’t love my poems and me unless I
spoon-fed them to you, soup and bread them to you
but when it all comes down to it
metaphorically, categorically, and anaphorically
you’ll never understand my 5-7-5, my free verse bomb
So read up
and I’ll find my own Langston while you’re gone.***

Naihaiwrimo (s'more)

#8
I love listening
to the broadway cast of Hair
Aquarius age

#9
I'm getting ready
Packing up my bags for now
to the future now

#10
Gold Rush is my heart
Even with our tir'd rap wars
We're in it to win

Naihaiwrimo

#4
I wish this wasn't
how it had to be sometimes
we'd be fireworks

#5
it never ceases
to amaze me how much you
give up on yourself

#6
you are so much more
than credit you give yourself
if only you'd try

#7
Adele makes me cry
Ben & Jerry are my friends
chick flicks and popcorn

February NaHaiWriMo :)

National Haiku Writing Month! Days 3-8

#3: Wondering about
why love is such a big deal
alone isn't bad

#4: Thought it'd never change
but I don't want anything
unless I have you

#5: I wish we could be
astronauts to catch wishes
leave the world behind

#6: Taylor Swift is right
it sucks that you're stuck on her
you belong with me

#7: I would write you songs
for ev'ry day of the week
you could sing along

#8: I keep having dreams
of you and me living dreams
not caring who sees

Coquettish; a slam poem

Coquettish

You propose to know exactly who I am from one look

Like you are the duchess of judgment, the princess of premier intelligence, like you are Madonna

You think that you can simply assume that I am mass produced, loose and flexible enough to fit into a packing box like you. That you can send me off to a realm where I am vulnerable. Bullshit.

You see, you are a believer in the Beyonce beat; that girls run the world by showing skin on more than their feet. That boys will bend to the unbearable heat of your 25 cent sneak peek. Lying about the life you seek as you sip a bottle; tongue in cheek. It’s just one time. It doesn’t classify hypocrisy in your self proclaimed odyssey. You wish that you could follow me but even your toes are threatened by the concrete, two steps behind me.

Dreamin’ on false doctrine; Jesus didn’t tell you that. John 3:16. Yeah it doesn’t mean that you can claim insanity since either way you’ll live eternally. Don’t blame God for your lonely mistakes that you calendered for Saturday with what’s his name? Jake?                                       You can’t even remember; too busy singing with Drake. He says he better find your lovin’ and your heart but wait…you left them at home with the rest of you.

A shell of yourself is all you came to. Don’t take it out on me; I don’t know you but I hope you’ll realize that now I don’t want to because you’re the kind of girl who makes me wish I was a boy. You give us the reputation of a slinky toy; for a good, not a long time. Way to let yourself be defined; quick like a shotgun but I won’t bite the bullet. You judging everyone else is just a precursor; cock and pull it.

Your mattel made mind is sick to think that you can hide behind trends and the color pink. These things don’t make you sweet; a rose by any other name would seem so much nicer as you mutilate others hearts in a deli slicer; proving the same sexist dogma you claim you’re against. Women belong in the kitchen, a proverbial fence put up by scared men because of ladies like you who live as feminine monsters.

I’d keep you locked up too if you treated me like a hungry dog that you just thought was greedy. I am sick of your goddamn pretense. You are no princess. You are not entitled to hate…so quit marching into my shop and making the bell on the door ring.

Liar

You never hear the expression lip-tied because it's always your tongue
I've never been conventional
you see I can't even get the words to the tip of my tongue enough for it to be tied
My heart just keeps telling my head, "Hey Kid you lied. You lied to yourself today"
My head gets confused and starts feeling abused by thoughts it was told not to think like the underage temptation of drinks
then my heart keeps crying "liar liar! Don't all these lies make you perspire at some point? Won't you ever tell the truth?"
Lies keep coming like tickets at a booth
that you never paid for
your emotions are never insured
even when your heart keeps screaming about your lies until you're insane
wishing you could hide in everything that's mundane
giving up the chance at adventure and risk
there's nothing here
until you start hearing that voice again and you finally shout
what is my conviction? where do my lies lie? Emotions just hide; they don't die.
You can keep harassing me but I know that you're right
I live every day and I lie every night
not only in my bed but in my own head
Yes, I lie to myself
on a constant basis
I am a liar to all of the familiar faces in my life
Because no one knows that I strive to quit being lip-tied more than anything
I just want to tell you what I mean
When you're on the other line of the phone and all you can say is her name
I can't help but feel anything less than shame
and I tuck away my feelings like dirty magazines under the bed
no one needs to know they're there right? I can just let them gather cobwebs instead.
I can just keep writing poems that no one will read
setting standards that the world just won't heed
being a leader for followers who lead
I am sick with malaria of the mind and alzheimers of the heart
because I force myself to forget that I wanted you
and my heart screams liar
as loud as it can
and I hit the snooze button for five more minutes...

you're everything....now if only you would notice....

I wish that you could understand
the heaviness of your words
when you say things that are doled out to me
Like maple syrup
waves of intensity covered in molasses intentions
I wonder if you wish that I'd
take a leap of faith
Cliff jumping is just as hard for me
I can feel wind running like smooth water
left rib to right rib
feels like fingers that I wish would curl around mine
as if you could mold new Frida Kahlo fingerprints
with intelligent eyes and a sunshine mind
clearer than the Aurora Borealis
I feel thoughts like children's swings
the wonderings
of how much you think of me
the lonely afternoons you describe
I wonder how much I'm on your mind
You are Pablo Neruda amongst Stephanie Meyers
The Southern sanctity to Northside fires
you are a solace of James Brown soul
next to secular sins we sooth our commercial ears with
You are my caffeinated Coca-Cola in a midnight cram
the kind of person who make me stand up and shout
Yes I am
I am proud of the life I lead
the beats I bleed
the poetry I roll and knead into
the bread of knowledge
that crushes your wining back into grapes
keeping privacy behind drapes
the Cyd Charisse class I will own till the day
I dance upstairs; foxtrot out of my grave
you keep me there
Even when it's war of the worlds outside
When people terrorize our souls
till we're soldiers refusing to die
You remind me that there's things worth the fight
You said you loved cruelty and cruelty is not unrequited
In loving you too even when it was uninvited
Unexpected
Unknown
to your expectations
I untied the knots in your thread
Where you embroidered roads to the wrong
I began to resew until the patterns flowed into art
You see a whole can't be torn apart
And the rainbow routes on your maps are all I need
to recap how I feel and patch up my wheels
to follow your heart with mine
It's not a race
I'm only asking if you wouldn't mind
Sharing the precious commodity of Carpe Diem
Time.
So I can fine tune my feelings into poems
Rhyme
My heart will confess to you like a jukebox that's been waiting for
Dimes
I just want you to know
that you're a New York skyline
even though nobody's ever told you before
It's because they were scared
to piss you off
Because someday you'll rule the world
Bigger than Tom Cruise or Al Gore
and I'll be here waiting for that day
You'll be standing on tables and I'll have tickets for the floor
Hoping you'll remember those lonely afternoons when I thought of you
Knowing I un-knotted your maps
Remembering that cruelty loves nothing more than your company