Someone Else

I am embarassed
by each clump of words I stumble over
they gather together in the sidewalk
like mechanisms to purposely trip me up
and I fall
I fall
I fall
quicker than I ever should
the wind is knocked out of me
I don't know who to be
I don't know who you see
but I do know I finally see
that I wish someone would write me
eventually
I wish there would be poems in my name
I'd have a claim to fame
that I could have someone to care
and abandon their shame
but so far
I just feel pretty lame
wanna chow down on some chocolate chips
I know it's 1 a.m. but I'm on netflix
I've only been thinking about this for weeks then something clicks
This sucks
and I could've avoided it
I feel stupid to the core
I feel as asinine as Jersey Shore
in all of my fist pumping glory
I feel like a Barbie doll bore
I have deplored every tactic to win you over
I wished on every four leaf clover
I was cliche as a game of red rover
I. Feel. Stupid.
and I'll drown myself in double dates with
Ben & Jerry
and I'll sing along to Silly Songs with Larry
It's scary
how you can get when all you really want
is for someone else
to write the poetry
with yourself on the other side
I just want to laugh despite my pride
Don't want to think of how much I've cried
Really I just want a hug
I just want a prince
I'm tired of frogs
I'm tired of this
I'm sick of losing
Can I be winning?
Charlie Sheen
The other girls take what they want because they're just mean
I don't have the capacity
I don't like confrontation
I just want to cuddle
and watch Disney animation
I want to swing dance
I want Moulin Rouge romance
I want to write poems and read Ginsberg
I want to make jokes about the Titanic iceberg
I want to laugh because we both never get sick of David after the Dentist
But all I really want is interest
Because it really seems like I must be the most uninteresting troll
You skip over my name when you're taking roll
My vote doesn't count when you're taking a poll
It's like you see the sky and then you see a hole
Because I sunk in
I'm sullen
I won't win
until I unglue my eyes from the computer screen
write something I really mean
until I quit being obscene
'cause this is me
scary
when all I want
is for someone else to write the poetry.