Blue Eyed Beauty

He was the blue eyed beauty of a generation
cleansing grunge
with his raspy rants and lyrical lies
He hid behind yellow braid possibilities
and little bags of pixie dust
that cost him more than he could pay
one day he didn't wake up
the world knew him for teen spirit
that would now be all that was left of him
as his Peavey amp static
spoke for him at the funeral
books of handwritten prayers
lay on apartment carpet
reminded of him in vain
who knew Nirvana meant heart drain
and cocaine
and love pain
and blood stain
and Cobain
He was the blue eyed beauty of a generation
After he crossed the threshold
no one could shut up about his perfect smile
while no one said anything about it
on the day to day
He was a soccer star
and honor roll hero
and popular with the ladies
like any other jock
walking halls in socks and Adidas sandals
on game day
he hid behind high school fame
he hid behind a name
he hid behind the very picket fence on his face
straight
fake
then his roommate entered the dorm
after a long day
swung open the door handle
noticing it was cold
on his hand
then he looked up
and so was the rest of him
because there he was
the blue eyed beauty
heart drain
love pain
blood stain
in vain
dangling from
broken dreams and unsaid prayers
as he only saw himself through circus mirrors
flawed
back turned by God
as everyone else hears the same damn
Peavey static
emotional attic
where light reaches its limit
We lift candles like it's all we can do
though none of them hold a candle to you
because the wax drips down
and we realize how much
we lock up
by not saying anything
because even though that wax seems passive
it stings like acid on your skin
as you let secrets drip down and
do the same
choosing not to say
choosing empty days
choosing walking death
aspirit breath
before you shut away
'I love you's remember
He was the blue eyed beauty
outside high school fame
inside Kurt Cobain
Don't judge the book by its cover
it's never the same
as the unspoken prayers
fill lines and pages
decomposition in different stages
hardbacks still crack
as blank sheets
fall out like a sign of surrender
Remember
He was the blue eyed beauty**